Haunting Assurance

 

O Lord, You have searched me and known me.
2 You know my sitting down and my rising up;
You understand my thought afar off.
3 You comprehend my path and my lying down,
And are acquainted with all my ways.
4 For there is not a word on my tongue,
But behold, O Lord, You know it altogether.
5 You have hedged me behind and before,
And laid Your hand upon me.
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me;
It is high, I cannot attain it.
7 Where can I go from Your Spirit?
Or where can I flee from Your presence?
8 If I ascend into heaven, You are there;
If I make my bed in hell, behold, You are there.
9 If I take the wings of the morning,
And dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea,
10 Even there Your hand shall lead me,
And Your right hand shall hold me.
11 If I say, “Surely the darkness shall fall[a] on me,”
Even the night shall be light about me;
12 Indeed, the darkness shall not hide from You,
But the night shines as the day;
The darkness and the light are both alike to You.

The former verses are found in the beginning of Psalm 139. While they are rather well known, and so in that respect, not spectacularly out of the ordinary, they hold some deep, double sided truths. The first thing that they incur, is a remarkable sense of peace. The words have a wonderful quality of being able to wrap around the soul, in a rare and rather wonderful manner. For in any circumstance, this Psalm comes as an assurance that God is NEVER absent, and more than that, never stops caring. That God is strong and constant, a place to lean and a refuge to seek.

However, these words carry another meaning, one not quite so reassuring, and certainly one that is far more subtle, and more quickly overlooked. That meaning, would be the words of a warning, or a caution. This Psalm, not only assures us, but reminds every person of the pathetic, fragile transparency of the human soul to the eyes of God. The words carry a reminder that God looks not at the mere actions or the outer face of men, but that he peers deep, into the very innermost places we would keep hidden. And so, this work takes on a rare quality. It is a sobering assurance, a reminder that though God is a refuge and a support, nothing is hidden, and no distance is too far for his eye to see. And that is most certainly a valuable thing to remember.